You missed it a million miles! It has become impossible for anything to come between us, and in my greatest glooms the thought of you emits light. I trust and love you now more than ever. The fact is, Comrade, that my swimming in this sewer of the modern consciousness sometimes nearly kills me with disgust. The darkness of the outlook comes over me like a rainy midnight, and for days and days I work automatically because I love and pity my own and still believe in honor, though the effective world seems to have repudiated all these feelings. I know the world is not lost, and I know that even now I am victor, in the long run, through my work. I know, too, that I am rich in the affection of a few people, among whom you loom very very large. But one can not souse in a sewer constantly without getting sick at times. I've been having one of those spells of nausea, and I've written no letters. Important business letters have been wearing out in my pockets — letters that I could have answered to my immediate advantage. Don't worry about this. Just keep on caring for me and
know that I care for you deeply and always.
Anyway, this time will pass, and I can always build a better world to work in when the opportunity is granted. I believe in men and women, but I believe little in the world scheme that is developing at a frightening speed. Slavery, peonage, — lying publicity, lying ads, people turned into sheep for the inevitable slaughter pen. Well, Comrade, we can maintain our faith in even a smoky torch. You and I will not surrender quit.
Jno.
The U of Neb. wants me to give the address at the first Honors Convocation in May. I am refusing. I refuse so much.
