Dear Lucile:

You did not fall off the high Sierras, and you did not get lost in the jungle of So. Calif.! Also, bless your heart, you did not forget me! It did seem a long, long time between letters. During the slowly lengthening silence, I grew sorrier and sorrier that I had been so mad at the Alys, and I decided I'd never be mad at you all again. I'm so glad I know where you are and that I can feel the time "fugiting" between now and Aug. 1st, or thereabouts!

I've made the Nebraska trip more than once in imagination. There is so much to tell, and I hope we can find time for all there is to do up there. Anyway, we'll give thanks for the time we have, for it is unlikely that we shall ever return there together after this summer. As we visit the various places, I'll talk into the recorder. Thus much, or something, of the mood should get across to you. (The talking to the tape can be done in the evenings, or at any time of leisure) Have you a camera? If you have, we can use it with the tape record.

Oh, Lucile, we're going to have some fun! People should try to be happy now—not afterwhile. Never is such a long, long time; and after a few ticks of the clock it's always never.

I didn't mean to come back here with Alice & the Girls. At the last minute, I decided to ride back with them. (Skyrim is so empty and I knew the Girls & Alice were reluctant to leave. So I went along to ease the transition a bit). I'll be going back (by plane) in a day or two; and it will be so empty there. The trees and bushes & hedges (and all the beauty of the place) have a "goodbye forever" look that I don't like. I push it away & deny it, and let on, and let on that the look isn't there. But it's there. Still, I'm no baby. I don't cry, and I'm so grateful for so much, so much. I'm grateful beyond words for 50 years with Mona and everything else

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and I'm so grateful that you are my friend and that you love what I have been able to do (with the help of the Other mostly) and that you care for me, whether I'm worthy or not.

I've been happy with Alice & the Girls and the sweet horses. Erica's spotted pony has become a friend of mine; and I've had fun renewing horse friendships. They do remember me and are glad to see me again. Animals are so wonderful. Young Bourbon Stonewall (a young stallion, son of our Orlaw n Lolita, who was never defeated in the show ring) is developing rapidly. It's good to see him learning his lessons every day. He remembers how we used to play & kid each other back at Skyrim. He would bite me; and I taught him to seize the manger with his teeth and hold fast while I petted his beautiful head. He has remembered this, and he has a happy, mischievous look in his eyes when we do the old way. He is the most beautiful being I've seen in a long while. The very horseness of horses! Such grace and power and beauty! I want to live to see him win blue ribbons before the eyes of ladies and (I was going to say 'kings,' but there ain't none) horse-trainers. He's good enough for the eyes of kings. And there are many other good, and some superlative, horses here — about 30 horses in the barn & on pasture. I do wish I could keep Skyrim going, I have some fine animals there. You'll love Lucifer's Carolyn's little boy; and you'll love Little Sister's stallion colt — bright chestnut, with white mane & tail!

I do like you, Lucile. And I do like Bower. And I'm not mad at the Alys at all any more.

It's good that old Stuart is having that experience. He's so advanced mentally, and I'd like to see him a hell-bender in some physical ways. All he needs is the opportunity and time enough. (A summer is pretty short). He's a great boy, and no mistake.

And do please tell your dear parents that I send affectionate thoughts to them, and that I mean just that. I know how good and dear they are; and I don't need an introduction. (Here I remember my old Grandmother Culler and how she used to rock and say to me: "O John, I know too much, so I do, I know too much." Sometimes, like this time, I seem to know what Grandma meant to say! Because I'm old myself — with an a very young spirit).

Next week I'll be going to see Harry Truman. He will take me thru his Library.

Write me at Skyrim again.

I almost wish I had the intestinal fortitude to work on some project as Bower is working this summer. But really, I am a bit ahead of my fans; and I do love to be lazy and think how wonderful the universe is, and how amazing it is that anyone should ever love anyone as I love some people, and (better still) as some people actually love me!) It's incredible! It's magic! It's not possible, and yet it is!

Be happy.

John